What a difference a year makes

What a year! So much has happened. It's so weird to think that this time last year we were in a different house, a different city, a different state. We had just started talking about Kent putting in for a new position with a different prison. We both hoped it would work out, but really we knew it would be a long shot.



And yet, here we are. Different house, different city, different state.

So much can happen and change in a year.

I am so thankful for the new opportunities that came along for us in 2009. I am hoping for more of the same in 2010.

Good-bye 2009! Hello 2010!

Happy New Year!

Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning

This was our first year without having several places to be on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. We were able to just lay around, enjoy each other and all our gifts. It was nice.

Christmas Eve the kids and I baked off and on all day. We did a gingerbread house (from a box), cooked a gingerbread boys and made other treats for Santa. The kids loved helping me in the kitchen and getting to decorate all the goodies. The later it got, the more excited the kids got. Finally, the kids had enough and started asking to go to bed so that Santa could come. So after reading about the birth of Jesus, reading The Night Before Christmas and seeing where Santa was at on the map they kids rushed to bed. It took them a while to finally go to sleep. While the kids were in bed Kent and I opened presents from each other. Kent got me a Wii with all the trimmings and a Wii Fit. He also got me a Pea coat. I got him a North Face jacket, some undies, 2 shirts and $50 giftcard to Best Buy. Kent then hooked up the Wii and we played for a bit. Then it was time to set out the presents from Santa and go to bed ourselves.

Around 1am Zoey sneaks into our room (which she does nightly) and climbed into bed. She told me that she saw that Santa had come! I told her she would have to wait until everyone else was up to open the presents. So she fell back asleep in our bed. Around 5:45am Jon Kent and Nathan woke up at the same time. So once they both got in the bed Zoey woke up and so it was time to see what Santa had brought. The kids were thrilled to see that Santa had eaten all the cookies and drank all the milk. AND he even left them a thank you note. Once the kids got the go ahead (and I got my camera) they tore into their gifts. Nathan needed a little help from his daddy... The kids got all that they asked for and a few extras. They were just thrilled and it was so great to see their excitement. This was the first year that the kids have really grasped the whole Santa thing and it was a blast to play along and relive my own childhood memories.

Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

Remember the reason for this season and all seasons.
Luke 2
Christ Born of Mary
1 And it came to pass in those days that a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered. 2 This census first took place while Quirinius was governing Syria. 3 So all went to be registered, everyone to his own city.4 Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David, 5 to be registered with Mary, his betrothed wife,[a] who was with child. 6 So it was, that while they were there, the days were completed for her to be delivered. 7 And she brought forth her firstborn Son, and wrapped Him in swaddling cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.
Glory in the Highest
8 Now there were in the same country shepherds living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night. 9 And behold,[b] an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid. 10 Then the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. 11 For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. 12 And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger.” 13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying: 14 “ Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!”[c]15 So it was, when the angels had gone away from them into heaven, that the shepherds said to one another, “Let us now go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has come to pass, which the Lord has made known to us.” 16 And they came with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the Babe lying in a manger. 17 Now when they had seen Him, they made widely[d] known the saying which was told them concerning this Child. 18 And all those who heard it marveled at those things which were told them by the shepherds. 19 But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart. 20 Then the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told them.

Our Christmas in Alabama

We had a wonderful time going back home to Alabama and spending some time with family and friends. We were overloaded with gifts, food and love. The kids were spoiled rotten and got all they asked for and more.

We had several stops to make and each one was special in it's own way. Sunday (12/20) we had Christmas with Kent's extended family. The kids had a great time playing with their cousins and opening gifts. That night we also went to the zoo to look at all the Christmas lights they had displayed.

Monday night (12/21) we went to Kent's parents' house and had Christmas with his mom, daddy, grandparents, brother, sister and Kent's sister's boyfriend. We ate, opened gifts and the kids played with all their toys.

Tuesday (12/22) the kids, Kent, myself and Kent's grandparents took the kids to the Bass Pro Shop ( Jon Kent wanted to go.. who really knows why) and then to Chuck-E-Cheese's. They had a great time there. Later that afternoon we went over to my parents' house to have Christmas with my parents, brother, sister-in-law, nephew and my MawMaw. We ate and opened gifts from each other. You should have seen allllll the wrapping paper. Crazy!

Wednesday (12/23) it was time to head home. We had a wonderful time with our families. We miss not being there with them, but we know our place is here. It's the first Christmas I haven't spent with my family and the same for Kent. But we are looking forward to sharing Christmas with our kids and starting new traditions for them.

So that was our Christmas in Alabama.. Sweet Home Alabama.

Christmas Eve traditions

My daddy, momma, brother and myself would all exchange gifts from one another on Christmas Eve. But my momma and daddy would save their gifts to each other for after my brother and I went to bed. I would always feel left out and always wanted to just sit and watch. But year after year it never happened. Finally, when I was a senior in high school I got to stay up and watch and take part in it. And also the Christmas before I got married. It was special to me.

Now, Kent and I do the same. We exchanged gifts to each other after the kids go to bed on Christmas Eve. And I plan to keep it that way for as long as I can. And then, if they want, once the kids are older let them be included. Who knows, maybe the tradition with continue on through them.

Animoto.com

Reliving Christmas memories.

When I was growing up and still a young child my family would always go over to my Aunt Karen Kay's house for our family's Christmas Eve gathering. I remember one night as we were walking out the door to go back home that my aunt said, "Do you see that? It's Rudolph's nose blinking!" It was really a radio tower's light blinking, but I believed her and my whole body filled with excitement that Santa was coming. I think about that every single year.

Being a parent I get to relive those type moments through my kids. The excitement that you can see in the kids' eyes when you talk about Santa or tell them they got a letter in the mail from him. How they listen to the story about the birth of Jesus and ask questions. It's almost like being a small child again, except this time you are the one building a memory for your child.

Simply wonderful.

Six years ago today.

I was at home. Completely out of it. Curled up in a tiny ball, with a huge blanket completely covering my body, head to toe, and I was sweating bullets. It was so freaking hot under that blanket but I was just too exhausted, weak to take it off. Not to mention, I didn't care to see another person who might be on the outside of that blanket. I just wanted to be invisible and to be honest I just wanted whoever was out there to just go away.

I was recovering from my second surgery, second miscarriage. I was done.

And six years later here I am. Three healthy, beautiful kids later and thankfully I came out from under that blanket. It took time. And from time to time I think what could've been. But mostly, I know that I wouldn't have it any other way.

Time does heal some wounds. Takes longer for some people. Each situation is different. That night I thought my world had ended. I felt like a failure. Like my own body had turned against me and that I had let my whole family and especially my husband down. But the reality is that it was the right time. God had other plans and while I still don't understand them I know I am better for the path I had to take to get where I am.

Six years ago today I was sad, hurting and hot. Now, I am happy, loved and filled with the warmth of having a wonderful family.

My week without kids- so far.

Has been mixed.

It started off wonderfully. Spent the whole weekend with my hubby. We had a date night, watched a movie, ate Mexican, had Starbucks for desert, stayed up late, went shopping for Santa. It was just peaceful. We weren't rushed or worried about getting back to the kids. It was just nice. We even slept until almost noon Saturday morning. Wonderful.

Then Sunday afternoon we get word that Jon Kent had some symptoms of pink eye. I told them to keep an eye (no pun intended) on him and I would check back with them the next morning. I also told them to give him some children's benadryl just in case it was allergies. So Monday morning I call and check on him and he hadn't gotten better and in fact his other eye was started to do the same thing. So I call his old pediatrician in Alabama and after jumping through hoops and explaining our situation (I'm in South Carolina, he's in Alabama with family, we were told earlier this would be fine, etc. etc. etc.) they gave us an appointment. It was/is pink eye. So he is on some drops for that. And I am hoping, hoping, hoping that no one else gets it. Zoey told my daddy that the reason Jon Kent's eye looked like that was because she hit him. That girl is a hoot.

Kent's momma called and told me that Sunday night Jon Kent was watching TV before bed and he turned around to her with tears in his eyes and a pout on his face. She asked him what was wrong and he said, "Do you think Jesus will make me see again?" She said he was so serious and sincere. So she went and recleaned his eyes for him and once she did that he said, "I can see again! I can see!!". That boy is such a sweet heart and so tenderhearted. If he keeps that sweet heart of his he is going to make a wonderful husband someday. But according to him he is going to live with me forever! That's my boy!!

So, so far my week has been good and has had a little bad to it. I miss my babies, but I am enjoying my free time to get things done and to just do it in my own time. I think after this week I will be a better mother for taking this break. At least I hope so!

Empty Nest

All my babies are in Alabama for 7 days.

What will I do with all my free time?

Sleep.

Clean.

Sleep.

Get rid of toys to make room for more toys.

Sleep.

Might actually run every day this week.

Sleep.

Go do more Santa shopping.

Sleep.

Play endless amounts of Farkle.

Sleep.

And of course miss my babies greatly.

And a little more sleep.

Mommy Life

Last night I was watching TV and something came on about this woman having a career and no children. And I thought, well I am the opposite. I have children and no career. I've held 1 job so far in my entire life. And for the first time ever, it bothered me. I know I am not meant to work right now. I am to be at home. Taking care of my children and keeping the home running smoothly. But someday, I do want to work. I want to work doing something I love and I fully believe that is in nursing. But that is still a bit off from now, just because of the move and then getting the kids started in school, etc. In the long run of things, I know my purpose was to be a mommy first and a career woman second or even third. But it just hit me wrong last night for some reason. I honestly just feel blah-ish lately. Maybe I am burnt out. I don't know. I'm hoping that once the kids go back to Alabama (did I mention they were leaving Friday to go to Alabama for a week?) and I am able to just chill and do whatever I want, that I will get refreshed and recharge my batteries. I want to be a good mom, and right now I don't feel I am giving the kids all they need. And I think it's just because I am spent.

In other news, the kids went to see Santa last night. They enjoyed it quite well. Zoey was talking to Santa and mentioned that her daddy was on Santa's naughty list. The back story to all that is I went to this website and made the kids and then Kent a video from Santa. It's actually very neat. Anyway, I made sure Kent was put on the naughty list for "not picking his underwear off the floor" and for "spending too much time on Facebook". Zoey told Santa the first part. It was hilarious. All the kids ended up sitting, without crying, in Santa's lap!

And lastly, I have 5 20% coupons to Gymboree that you can redeem online. First come, first served.

Why me?

Why am I a mother? And why am I a mother to Jon Kent, Zoey and Nathan. Why not 3 other kids and why not another mother for the 3 that I have?

These are questions that have been running through my mind lately. And the reason they have been running through my mind lately is because I have been questioning my mothering. Of late, I have just been feeling overwhelmed with my responsibilities. Have these 3 lives that I am supposed to mold and shape into productive citizens.

Am I doing it right? Am I doing enough?

More questioning.

Are my kids getting what they need from me or am I selling them short? Are we doing enough educational activities? Are we doing enough fun activities? Are we having enough family time? Am I a good example for them to look to?

Motherhood is hard. And sometimes I want to bust out of it like my hair is on fire.

I want to know, now, if I am doing enough. Or if I need to do more. I want the very best for my 3 and I want to be able to give it to them. I want their little love tanks to be full and never lacking.

So, again, why me? Why am I their mother?

Jon Kent and Zoey's Birthday Party

Dressed and ready for their party.

Whoa!

Wheeeee!

Nate and his Aunt Kerith

Zoey playing with Kayla Grace

It might not be his party but he wasn't going to give up the throne!

Party room

Blowing out the candles!

Picture with Monkey Joe!

Gift time!

All the gifts.

Kent playing.

Kent resting.

Letters to Santa

I got this idea from Karen and the kids loved it! We will have to make this a yearly thing.

First, they looked through all the toy books we got in the mail.

Jon Kent and Zoey were helping Nathan.

Nathan gluing down his pictures.

Jon Kent doing the same.

All finished.

Nathan decided he would let his big brother hold his picture for him.

Jon Kent's letter

Zoey's letter.

Nathan's letter.

Out takes from our photo shoot